Maori Legend of Man-Eating Birds is True 338
jerryatrix writes "Legends of the New Zealand Maori tell of giant man-eating birds. New scientific evidence proves that these birds did exist and were around the same time as humans in New Zealand. From the article, 'Scientists now think the stories handed down by word of mouth and depicted in rock drawings refer to Haast's eagle, a raptor that became extinct just 500 years ago.'"
so... (Score:5, Funny)
Still unanswered... (Score:1, Funny)
No word on the part of the legend where they also had giant lasers...
Re:so... (Score:5, Funny)
Of course not! Not any more -- did you see the size of those Dingo eating birds?
Damn. (Score:4, Funny)
And now you know why LOTR was made in New Zealand (Score:5, Funny)
The eagles are coming! The eagles are coming!
And you thought that was CG!
Re:so... (Score:3, Funny)
Actually there is no evidence that there was ever any land animals whatsoever in NZ except for lizards, insects and spiders. Unless you count flightless birds.
So, aside from the sheep-eating lizards, poisonous insects, deadly spiders, and territorial (and vicious) birds... you'd be perfectly safe.
Re:so... (Score:2, Funny)
we're not always at the top
Sometimes it's nice not to be on top.
You know, change it up a little.
Keeps things fresh.
Puts a little spice in things.
Who am I kidding... *sigh*
Let me break it down for you... (Score:3, Funny)
Don't go into Power Dome A [penny-arcade.com].
Re:Glad these things are gone (Score:5, Funny)
Some species of Terror Bird [wikipedia.org] would chase down their prey and literally peck it to death. They had an interesting feature about these things on Discovery last night; with this story it just seemed appropriate to mention it.
Polly wants a cracker. NOW. And a couple of llamas. And a six pack of assorted primates, starting with you.
Cool, but can we clone it? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Still unanswered... (Score:5, Funny)
It started with just the most basic machines, toys really. They're were inspired by God because He'd taken it into His thought about His thought thinking about His thought that since He'd created the place, He was best seen as the Designer, an Intelligent Designer. The Devil argued God hadn't really designed anything at all, had just set things out then let things "Go to Hell", as the Devil put it. But God went on about Intelligent Design and how Man, in His image, should be an Intelligent Designer too. That's when it all started about the machines. The Devil can't stand infernal machines. It's his hearing, it's too acute. He has to be that way to hear even the slightest hint of malicious intent. He finally had enough and headed out with all the lesser spirits in attendance. The lesser spirits were spooked by the machines, called them unnatural.
I was probably the last one to get a good deal on my soul. Soon after I cut my deal, the Devil just didn't make any more offers. His heart just wasn't in it anymore.
God likes the way things have gone. His creations creating. Turning out machines intelligently designed, or nearly so. We haven't spoken in a while, but, when last we spoke He was big on the idea of the entire world as a giant Dyson sphere. I miss the old days when evil had some value.
Regards
A. Faustus
it's past my bedtime, i'm over tired and am probably gonna be sorry i posted this, but what the hell.
Yup.. (Score:5, Funny)
Yup,...it'd be a pretty Odd man that eats a Maori. Pretty tough buggers those. :-) A bit of a step up from Pit Bull I tell you!
Re:Okay. . . (Score:4, Funny)
Pffft. We don't want New Zealand! Tasmanians are bad enough with all their in-breeding. If we allow the New Zealanders in we'll forever be associated with beastiality as well!
DNA? (Score:2, Funny)
Is there any chance of getting some DNA, cloning a few of these dudes, so that we can set them loose in the cities? I can see the population problem slowly improving. I can see the gene pool improving, at the same time. This idea has promise.....
Re:Still unanswered... (Score:5, Funny)
"After an unprecedented archeological effort, the last page of the original bible has finally been found. It contains just one sentence."
it's past my bedtime, i'm over tired and am probably gonna be sorry i posted this, but what the hell.
no evidence of land animals? (Score:4, Funny)
So, aside from the sheep-eating lizards . . .
. . . well I'm hoping the sheep eating lizards found more than just evidence of 'land animals' else they would soon become 'fuck, where's the sheep?' lizards. Admittedly they sound dangerous too . . .
Re:Yup.. (Score:5, Funny)
Yup,...it'd be a pretty Odd man that eats a Maori. Pretty tough buggers those.
Tough? You're probably cooking them too fast. Have you tried preparing one sous-vide ?
Re:so... (Score:5, Funny)
"The actual news here is that they co-existed with the Maori"
If by co-exist you mean EAT THEM, then yes, there was a lot of co-existence.
Re:so... (Score:5, Funny)
Deadly spiders? New Zealand has no snakes and only one species of poisonous spider
That's because the Maori's ate them all. Seriously, the bloody Maori's are the only native race to ever get a treaty from the vicious pommy bastard tribe!
Re:so... (Score:5, Funny)
What have Texans got to do with it?
Re:NZ pacifist warrior culture (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Begs the question... (Score:1, Funny)
By buggering things.
Re:so... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:New Zealand fauna (Score:4, Funny)
and wiped out many species of Weta Bugs.
So that's why their massive software runs so well!
In Australia too! (Score:5, Funny)
Australia also has plenty of man-eating birds only there they call them Sheilas...
Re:Kind of a shame... (Score:5, Funny)
It would be cool if it was alive today...
Yeah... That would roc!!
Re:so... (Score:3, Funny)
because it'd evolved to be flightless like the birds.
You mean 'was designed to'.
--
I don't mind the karma burn, just can't let a joke slip by
Re:no evidence of land animals? (Score:5, Funny)
That's nothing (Score:3, Funny)
I went to a fair once and saw a six foot man eating chicken.
True story.
Re:Yup.. (Score:3, Funny)
Tough? You're probably cooking them too fast. Have you tried preparing one sous-vide ?
Close. Slow cooked in a wet sand pit filled with hot rocks and covered with palm leaves is the regional cooking method. Kind of like a clam bake, without the clams.
Re:Still unanswered... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:no evidence of land animals? (Score:3, Funny)
Sorry, wrong URL. You're looking for http://www.adultsheepfinder.co.nz/ [adultsheepfinder.co.nz]