'u' — the First Authentic Klingon Opera On Earth 165
j0ris writes "The Klingon are passionate opera-lovers, but little is known about their highly evolved form of musical expression. Floris Schonfeld is the initiator and director of 'u', the first authentic Klingon opera on earth. He studied Klingon music theory for over a year, and together with several experts developed various indigenous Klingon instruments. The Terran Klingon Research Ensemble has been set up to further develop a coherent Klingon musical practice amongst human musicians. 'u' premieres on September 9 in The Hague, Netherlands. An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope."
Klingon opera (Score:5, Funny)
Does it sound like beating someone to death with something large and heavy?
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Yes. And they serve food that isn't cooked properly and stands a decent chance of killing you. In other words, this is pretty much a normal rock concert except the performers would never bite the heads off a live bat - there's no honor in it.
Re:Klingon opera (Score:4, Funny)
The last line of the opera is "Today is a Good day to Die" sung in harmony with those that will do battle before they kill each other.
Uh huh (Score:5, Insightful)
The Klingon are passionate opera-lovers, but little is known about their highly evolved form of musical expression.
I imagine so, what with them being fictional and all.
Re:Uh huh (Score:5, Funny)
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No, it's similar to "Genuine Nerf [wikia.com] Leather"
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Isn't that similar to "Genuine Imitation Leather"?
Hello, I am Ricardo Montalban and it's more like soft Corinthian leather.
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Khhhhaaaannnn!
Going on about klingon proverbs...
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Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!
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No. Leather exists, while Klingons only exist in our thoughts. That makes everything authentic.
It's more like the equivalent of "Authentic Biblical Dramatization", and there is no shortage of those.
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Yeah, I was, you know, just kidding. Speaking of "heads up"...
Geez, Slashdot get less jolly every day. :(
Klingons in the Netherlands? Someone call Wilders! (Score:2)
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Sadly, the Klingons probably will not be in attendance. The invitation was sent by radio-telescope, which suffers from a speed-of-light limitation.
Rest assured, when it arrives, the Klingons will be mighty peeved at our lack of courtesy in neglecting to send it via subspace, and will come and wipe us out. Our only hope is to hold an encore performance upon their arrival and to do a really good job. Then they might allow us to die with honor, as equals, in the field of battle.
“I don't mind what language an opera is sung (Score:5, Interesting)
.
NOT authentic (Score:2, Funny)
An authentic Klingon opera ends with the cast killing off every member of the audience.
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The premier isn't until September.....give it time.
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I wish Klingons spoke old English, since they're so like the anglo saxons. Imagine if all this energy was going into bringing that back!
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It's good fun though!
Will They Accept The Invitation...? (Score:1)
An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope.
Just waiting if they are going to accept or not
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And are the Kronos Quartet playing orchestra? (Score:2)
They usually do stuff that's more delicate than Klingon opera, but with a couple of extra percussion players they should be up for the job.
WWKD? (Score:1)
He'd probably spell his name right... * (Score:3, Funny)
... and THEN run you through with his genuine reproduction bat'leth.
* Kahless
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qeylIS DaghItlhchu'be'chugh vaj bIHegh
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Off Broadway (Score:1)
Radio signal? (Score:5, Funny)
Unless it's a subspace transmission, it's not reaching Kronos before September 9th.
Do you know any Klingo Opera? (Score:3, Insightful)
Surely you must know at least one theme from "Aktuh and Melota".
Can I get a half-price ticket? (Score:1, Funny)
For my targ?
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It will be a tasty part of the feast afterwards.
ut oh (Score:1)
I hope they don't send their music critics or else we wont be seeing very many more productions like this. How do you think their opera got so good? Natural selection.
Busted! (Score:1)
Totally alien language, yet a question ("When will it happen?") is indicated by intonation, and one identical to English at that? What are the odds?
Instead, how about if a question is indicated by a gentle squeezing of the inner butt muscles, followed by rapid blinking, a slight tilt of the head in the direction of the sun, and an excretion of Corduroy smelling gel from the small pores of the middle armpit?
Yeeesh.
"Indigenous Klingon instruments" (Score:3, Insightful)
I'm curious as to how there are "indigenous Klingon instruments" in this, when there's the small fact that KLINGONS AREN'T REAL.
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Not real? Then what WAS it we spotted while on patrol, circling Uranus?
Intriguing (Score:3, Insightful)
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Or perhaps this is what he was getting at all along - we are Klingons.
No, different groups of humans are different races from Star Trek.
For instance, Americans are Ferengi, with their credo "profit ueber alles".
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Maybe a few decades ago, but these days they remind me of American CEOs and other Wall Street types.
It's not over until... (Score:4, Funny)
Well... (Score:3, Funny)
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Lucy Lawless is *so* 1990's. I want to spend our last few days with Felicia Day, or perhaps Eliza Dushku.
Authentic? (Score:1, Redundant)
Repeat after me: "Star Trek is NOT a documentary!"
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No, but it should be.
I will chop you up! (Score:1)
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I can just imagine a stirring rendition of:
"'obmaQ vIQach 'ej porghlIj 'ay'Du' vIchev."
The sheer elegance of "I wield an axe and separate your body parts." is surely breathtaking.
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(Missing operator before ay'Du?)
String found where operator expected at klingon.pl line 1, at end of line
(Missing semicolon on previous line?)
syntax error at klingon.pl line 1, near "'ej porghlIj 'ay'Du"
Can't find string terminator "'" anywhere before EOF at klingon.pl line 1.
To quote the great SNL-hosting Shatner.... (Score:2)
"Get a life will you, people?"
Radio telescopes transmission (Score:2)
An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope.
I'm willing to suspend belief as to whether Klingons exist, Kronos exists or whether anyone has reproduced authentic Klingon instruments but damn it I will not buy into sending signals via radio telescope. They're not transmitters.
Dear Slashdotters, Thank you for your comments (Score:5, Interesting)
Homeworld is NOT "Kronos" (Score:2)
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Kronos -- DI'vI Hol
Same planet, different language.
Thanks... (Score:2)
I have to applaud... (Score:2)
the dedication of ST Fans who would go to all this bother to produce a fakeumentary to get advertising, and who have produced a Klingon Opera. The fans of the Klingon language are very persistent and devoted, if perhaps a bit odd to say the least. Its entirely silly to me of course, but to each their own.
If you want more:
'U' recreating the primal sound of Klingon Opera:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFNwKNyCnSU [youtube.com]
Scene 3:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6HBlvu3AsM [youtube.com]
Inter Planetary Court of Justice (Score:2)
Depending on who's side you are it's brilliant or disgusting.
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Authentic Klingon? (Score:1, Redundant)
There, I said it, now go back to your basements and cry!
Next: Vogon poetry ... (Score:2)
I speak for us all when I say (Score:2)
NO U [encycloped...matica.com]
I went about 30 seconds in... (Score:2)
Re:Wow (Score:5, Insightful)
It must be terrible for you to suffer your inferiors who don't enjoy your specific type of nonproductive entertainment, and instead have discovered their own types of nonproductive entertainment that are unlike your own obviously superior one.
Re:Wow (Score:5, Interesting)
Star Trek is awesome. I have a bookcase, not a book shelf, a bookcase full of nothing but Star Trek novels, analysis, and reference books. That doesn't make it real, and treating it like it is real is the height of idiocy. These people are twits.
*(Yes, that's Trekkie, not Trekker. Anybody who thinks they are exposing me or correcting me somehow can go fuck themselves. Trekker was coined by a bunch of whiny butt hurt people whose self-esteem was crushed by William Shatner on SNL because they had no sense of humor and couldn't laugh at themselves.)
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I think you are supposed to watch the video clip, like you would watch any star trek episode. If they don't perform this in a genuine way, it becomes a joke to watch, rather than something that sparks the imagination. I do hope that the people are just doing the theater without holding the expressed views as actual belief. If so, they did an excellent job, it was inspiring to watch. Although I couldn't help but laugh at some parts.
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Re:Wow (Score:5, Insightful)
If they're trying to do this "in universe" then they have to trace it to part of the canon.
Says who? "Canon" is itself a work of fiction. You yourself stated this was all fiction and no one should take it seriously, now you're stating that the equally-fictional canon is some sacrosanct concept that should be taken seriously? It's all made up. I'm happy for you that you enjoy it, and Paramount's accounting department is probably even happier. But you've already bought all the books, and they are looking for more people willing to part with their money.
I think the people who own the copyrights and trademarks to the various aspects of the Star Trek universe can pretty much do whatever they want with it. As long as these jamokes pay their licensing fees to Paramount, it's all good, people will have a little fun, and money will be made. That's entertainment.
Actually, the thought just occurred to me that this all could have happened in the new Universe that JJ Abrams created with the whole "red matter"/Universe split/"nanner-nanner-nanner canon does not apply to me any more!" thing in the latest movie. In THAT canon, none of your resource materials apply, so you'd better go get yourself a new bookshelf if you want to continue following "the universe", because it's all changed now.
Or you can just sit back and enjoy the entertainment in all of its fun forms, choosing the ones you like the best, and ignoring the others.
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Red matter gives me a headache...
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It's quite simple.
There was, until recently, one "canon". Every time a movie came out, the plot invariably ran afoul of the previous fiction base, and trekkie/ers sent forth a shitstorm of "canon busts" where the math didn't add up on transit times between planets, or the Vulcan council didn't vote by majority, or the batleth that so-and-so carried wasn't truly regulation because it had one too many rope wraps around the handle, or whatever. All good fun to read, but I think Paramount was getting annoyed,
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It may be a brilliant plot device, but it's a stupid name. Couldn't he have come up with some better technobabble?
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To be honest, I don't see it so much as "I couldn't think of a better name for this mysterious substance that exists solely as a plot device" but rather "Look, it's magic stuff. You don't care what it's called and neither do I. It doesn't make any difference. The SFX is red so we'll call it 'Red Matter' and not get our pocket protectors in a bunch worrying about pointless details."
To which I said, "Sounds good to me" Star Trek physics has gotten pretty silly in the past 15 years or so, and frankly I jus
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It may be a brilliant plot device, but it's a stupid name. Couldn't he have come up with some better technobabble?
At least its better than "unobtanium".
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The only thing Star Trek about that film was the ship's name.
Which is exactly the point.
Abrams may or may not still honor Rodenberry's vision, that's still to be determined because the only thing he's done so far is divest himself of the Roddenberry/Berman Trek Universe. He may yet create a consistent and reasonably plausible universe because all he's done so far is make up a plot device that he can make consistent with his universe, and parallel universes are largely a scientific unknown at this point.
He'll surely build something inconsistent with the OLD universe,
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Berman's interpretation ... made an honest effort at having a consistent, reasonably plausible universe that honored Roddenberry's vision.
Hogwash. The moment DS9 and Voyager came on the air, Berman had veered away from Roddenberry's vision. The very idea of the Maquis, while making the series more interesting, was expressly against Roddenberry's vision for a peaceful, we-all-get-along future. Berman was selling a series just the same as Abrams is selling movies. At least Abrams found a plot device that allowed him to tell an interesting story in his own way without destroying Roddenberry's vision. Berman can't say the same.
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The moment DS9 and Voyager came on the air, Berman had veered away from Roddenberry's vision.
I disagree strongly. Regardless, of the quality of the shows (IMO, DS9 was very good and Voyager was (mostly) pretty lame), I think the shows maintained Roddenberry's visions but tried to put them different settings, which at the time was sorely needed.
The Federation is made up of people of many races that, as a whole, share that vision, and we see that that vision is not only possible, but is likely if not inevita
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Well, technically, the universe split crap (and yes I do mean crap) that Abrams came up with only effects events after Kirk's dad died. Which is still a couple of centuries in the future for us. Events up till that point remain the same, and therefore even in Abrams' new (crap) canon, we still haven't discovered Klingons by 2010, so ElectricTurtle is correct.
But he's also wrong because Abrams wasn't the first guy in Trekdom to come up with alternate timelines, and time travel, and other plot contrivances. I
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I had posited in another post that maybe there were actually Klingons on board that Bird of Prey, and they simply left the ship when the cameras weren't looking.
It may have simply taken them this much time to fit into Earth society sufficiently, get over there, and organize all of this.
There are a few explanations that still fit canonical, if you want to take canonical all that seriously.
Just for shits and giggles, there's also the new canonical that does not preclude someone going back in time and changing
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Just had a thought...
In "Star Trek: Saving The Whales", a Klingon ship was used to come back and retrieve the whales, right?
The same movie in which Scotty handed transparent aluminum over to the firm that has yet to actually announce it, right (simply demonstrates that some canon already is in disagreement with reality, but I digress).
So, here's your canon hook. There were Klingons on board that ship that Kirk and co failed to notice. They exited the ship on Earth while the camera wasn't pointed at it, to
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So writing an opera based on the fictional Klingons and asking people to pretend they are real in marketing materials is somehow wrong compared to writing movies based on them and asking people to pretend they are real by purchasing bookshelves of reference materials?
They are different forms of expression inspired by Roddenberry's Star Trek universe. Obviously marketed to a different market segment than the one you are in. Gotta keep milking that there cash cow, and you've bought all the books, so they ar
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Bet it'll put some paid asses in seats, though. The folks who go to this opera aren't going to get all het up about a funny publicity stunt. Personally, I think it's a hilarious touch, and if you want to compare dick sizes my Trek reference materials and books take up way more than a bookshelf.
PS: "some douchebag"'s name is Marc Okrand. If your shelf of reference materials is filed alphabetically, you might want to look up that name sometime. I think he's earned the right to cash in on a little of the
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And I don't think that Marc Okrand, regardless of inventing Klingon, has any more right to inflict poor execution of things outside of his realm of expertise, such as acting, as he clearly sucks at it. I wouldn't take bad acting and poor execution from Matt Jeffries j
Re:Wow (Score:4, Insightful)
I just see this as elaborate roleplay -- just as some people are giant Star Wars nerds (/wave) and will talk about the ethical ramifications of the Force, or some Star Trek nerds might speculate on how an economy like that depicted on Star Trek might work (or might fail). They don't need to believe it is real to do this. (Granted, some crackpots might really believe it's real. Many would consider them crazy. OTOH, millions of people believe in invisible all-powerful beings that dictate how we should act.)
An opera is a story, and doesn't need to be about Real People. It could be an opera about magical hamsters, and if the plot and music were good, it could be good. (OK ... magical hamsters? I admit that's pushing it.) The fact is, the (fictional) Klingon culture is one with a rich (imagined) heritage, and has stories and lore and heroes in it which could make potent entertainment.
I would love to see a hero's journey played out with Klingon characters, exploring Klingon warrior culture, etc -- just as I love watching Kurosawa's films, or watching Lord of the Rings, or playing video games with plots. The libretto of this opera sounds like it could be awesome. Granted, it's quite possible this was all just someone trolling for attention, and the opera (if it exists) will suck, but the possibility of an opera about Kahless would be frickin' awesome. It would be like someone making an opera about the formation of the Rings of Power, and Sauron's rise to power.
Can you imagine a big-budget movie of such a plot? (The story of Kahless, that is.) It would have betrayal, murder, sex, love, regained honor, brutal tyrants, vengeance, and triumph. No wonder Klingons like Hamlet.
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In a way, that's the whole point of SF -- To explore how people relate to new technology, new cultures and new ways of living.
In 1966 it may have seemed far fetched to have the crew of the Starship Enterprise [nasa.gov] carrying around flippy communicators [retrobrick.com] and tricorders [palminfocenter.com] while jotting down notes [oldcomputers.net] on tiny pad-like computers [willitblend.com], but after years of watching and wondering "Why not?", here we are.
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"Eeeeee"
"Why, Mr. ElectricTurtle, they don't seem to like you!"
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(Holds Tribble near ElecticTurtle)
yIH!
"Eeeeee"
"Why, Mr. ElectricTurtle, they don't seem to like you!"
There fixed it for you :)
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It seems like an interesting study in meta-creation, meaning in order to create from a fictional work you have to make the fiction that exists into the rule boundaries for your work to be considered part of the same fictional narrative.
Re:Wow (Score:4, Insightful)
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You should receive no pity from Kahless.
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You should receive no pity from Kahless.
Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
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(I don't pity him...)
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All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms;
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealo
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Re:Really now? (Score:4, Insightful)
Just like anyone who writes opera, or music, or books, or does anything remotely creative, huh?
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I don't see how the involvement of the person who made it all up makes it any less made up.