Pee On Your Phone STD Test 208
Shakrai writes "British health officials are hard at work on a new app that will allow users to pee into their cell phones and find out within minutes if they have an STD. From the article: 'Doctors and technology experts are developing small devices, similar to pregnancy testing kits, that will tell someone quickly and privately if they have caught an infection through sexual contact. People who suspect they have been infected will be able to put urine or saliva on to a computer chip about the size of a USB chip, plug it into their phone or computer and receive a diagnosis within minutes, telling them which, if any, sexually transmitted infection (STI) they have. Seven funders, including the Medical Research Council, have put £4m into developing the technology via a forum called the UK Clinical Research Collaboration.'"
Pay as you 'go' plan (Score:5, Funny)
Obligatory "app for that" comment (Score:3, Funny)
STD? (Score:1, Funny)
Calling Dr. iPhone (Score:5, Funny)
Warning!!!! (Score:1, Funny)
You have been infected!
click here now to order our latest antivirus hardware.
Our sensors have also found you could use our latest VIAGRA products,
Order them together and get a discount!
The future isn't going to change anything.
Re:Calling Dr. iPhone (Score:3, Funny)
The latest status updates:
[...] is now single - four hours ago.
[...] now has Herpes - six hours ago.
Other remote testing (Score:2, Funny)
Can a hack to test for midi-chlorian count be far behind?
Re:I could be wrong, but... (Score:3, Funny)
I don't practice monogamy, I never need condoms, but I still have zero risk of STD.
That's a HARDware solution. (Score:3, Funny)
He specifically asked for SOFTware. Some people have sensitive behinds.
Also, some of us believe that when you buy a piece of hardware there shouldn't be any anal violence attached to the process.
Again, not something iPhone is able to provide.
Re:I could be wrong, but... (Score:2, Funny)
I don't practice monogamy, I never need condoms, but I still have zero risk of STD.
Switching between your left and right hand still counts as a single partner.
Re:really? (Score:5, Funny)
Blame the editors, I used a different headline when I submitted the article.
Let's not start a pissing match
WARNING (Score:3, Funny)
.
related note: Used HTC Inc for sale. Froyo. Almost like new. almost. Cheap!
Re:really? (Score:3, Funny)
Would you have even looked at the article if the headline had been different? The headline is perfect and my entire office just laughed their asses of at cooking their testicles and then peeing on their phone.
Re:really? (Score:5, Funny)
I guess they thought it would make a bigger splash.
Re:Calling Dr. iPhone (Score:5, Funny)
I would say it's more of a golden age.
Re:I could be wrong, but... (Score:3, Funny)
Well, Scotland and Wales are in the UK -- I know for sure I've heard many a Scotsman/sheep joke.
Never really been sure what the Welsh are saying though -- there could be sheep involved. It's hard to tell.
Re:Pay as you 'go' plan (Score:4, Funny)
Pee as you 'go' plan
There, fixed for ya.
Re:really? (Score:3, Funny)
No... It will just be posted to facebook, sms to all your contacts and emailed to your girlfriend.