Can You Potty Train a Cow? 214
sciencehabit writes "Think potty training a child is hard? Try teaching a cow when and where to do its business. The bovines can defecate nine to 16 times daily, creating big hygiene problems on dairy and beef farms. So cueing the animals to go in the right place would be a big help for managing manure. But past techniques—including training cows to respond to mild electric shocks—have proven ineffective or impractical for wide use. To see if they could come up with a better potty prompt, scientists tested a series of stimuli on a dozen Holstein cows. The milkers stood in or walked through a footbath filled with water, for example, or had air or water sprayed on their feet. Alas, '[n]one of our tests reliably stimulated defecation,' the team reports."
News for nerds. (Score:5, Funny)
Ladies and gentlemen: Slashdot in 2013.
Re:Death camps not enough (Score:5, Funny)
Fuck meat and diary consumers.
Think of the trees !
Re:Apparently not. (Score:2, Funny)
Change the topic to Ask Slashdot, and let's see if we can figure this out! My recommendation is to try cow hypnosis.
I seriously doubt it... (Score:5, Funny)
I lost any respect I ever might have had for bovine kind when I witnessed the miracle of life one day. A newborn calf so fresh it was still wet stumbled gingerly up to Momma, looking for a teat to suck.
The calf approached from the rear, and right as it got in range, BLAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!! Moma took a huge steaming crap right on widdle baby's head.
It was OK though. While the crap was still dribbling out, she unleashed a fire hose of urine right in the calf's face and washed most of the crap off. Momma cows care, people. Momma cows care!
Re:As someone who has raised cattle (Score:5, Funny)
I call bullshit.