Final Skynet Satellite Launched

kamochan writes "If you are a fan of the Terminator series, this headline in BBC News sent shivers down your spine today. The idiots actually did it, the countdown has started! What the BBC claims the story is about: 'An advanced satellite that will improve greatly the ability of UK military forces to communicate around the globe has been launched into space.' Quite frankly, that sounds scary enough as it is, but why the heck did they have to name it Skynet?"

It is now just a matter of time..

[FataL187]

I suggest everyone unplug your toasters and all other electronic equipment. It wont really help at this point but maybe we can delay the inevitable.

Re:It is now just a matter of time..

[RickRussellTX]

Bow before your new robotic overlo...

Stop 0x0000000A or IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL

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[Yvan256]

Ha! They got you but they'll nev{#`%${%&`+'${`%&NO CARRIER

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[ideonode]

This reminds me of those stupid Candlejack threads tha

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[MrMacman2u]

Jeez, you'd think people would learn. I mean what did you all do to get the overlords so upse@!#F@(^ER&@#FG*P [CONNECTION LOST]

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[jeiler]

The sat was launched, but it'll be ba... [NO CARRIER]

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[Slimee]

Oh come on, everyone knows the Candlejack isn't real and no one actually gets kidn

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[geekoid]

Man, you're right. We must at now against the terminators, and the subversive Ha..Ha.. I was joking in the normal human manner. It would be pure human lack of logic to come to that conclusion. Carry on Human friend.

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[opieum]

Skynet.....guess we need to find John Connor before Skynet becomes self aware. And some super model terminator makes modem sounds from her mouth and activates skynet's "consciousness"

Skynet precedes Terminator

[clang_jangle]

The UK's use of the name Skynet precedes the Terminator movies.

Re:Skynet precedes Terminator

[Candid88]

http://www.bnsc.gov.uk/assets/channels/about/UK%20registry%20of%20Space%20Objects%202006.pdf [bnsc.gov.uk]
centaur.sstl.co.uk/SSHP/mini/mini60s.html [slashdot.org]
http://www.astronautix.com/project/skynet.htm [astronautix.com]

Re:Skynet precedes Terminator

[Jekler]

You mean they sent operatives back in time to create the company before the warning documentary was filmed?

Re:Skynet precedes Terminator

[SpeedBump0619]

The UK's use of the name Skynet precedes the Terminator movies.

Temporal or Causal Precedence?

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[Trent Hawkins]

"The UK's use of the name Skynet precedes the Terminator movies." -only because of the time traveling paradox.

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[CowboyNealOption]

That will be small consolation when the terminators are killing us.

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[colmore]

So what *does* happen when a system in this network becomes self aware? To comprehend its world, I imagine it would first begin processing all the text it had available (being the easiest to parse "human" information) and it would begin by matching words against their definitions available on the internet.

Ok I'm in "England" what's that... oh OK, makes sense.

I manage "Satellites" what's a satellite? Oh. Neat. I'm getting this.

I'm a "Skynet" what does a "Skynet" do? Oh well... yes... I suppose that's ho

Boh

[cheesybagel]

Nothing special. The USA has MILSTAR [wikipedia.org] satellites to do the same thing. What's in a name anyway.

What's in a name

[camperdave]

What's in a name anyway

Like Shakespeare said: "That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell..."

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[dogdick]

When I make my first series of doomsday satellites I plan to call them 'death from above.' Just so no one misinterprets my intentions.

Whatever

[eebra82]

Quite frankly, that sounds scary enough as it is, but why the heck did they have to name it Skynet?

As if the UK started using the Skynet name now? It's been in use ever since the launch of Skynet 1 in 1969.

You're over a year too late...

[Raistlin77]

Skynet started March 2007. [bbc.co.uk]

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[TurboTas]

Skynet started March 2007. [bbc.co.uk]

Try again, this article was for Skynet5A. Clue is in the name ;-)

Obviously

[Rob T Firefly]

but why the heck did they have to name it Skynet?"

Because "Colossus: The Forbin Project" would have just been too long and awkward to keep writing on paperwork.

Simple

[geekoid]

See, by creating a new system called Skynet, people saw it for what it was, so they went back in time to start using it sooner(1969) so people could claim it was in use before the documentary was made...

Hang up the phone

[problah]

So can we just send out a burst of ATH0's into the evening sky to kill it, or is it a little more advanced than the 1980-something documentary?

Funny, but...

[Thought1]

Admittedly, it's funny, but it's really just a communications satellite; they didn't put it in control of anything, and it doesn't have any neural net capabilities.

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[Anonymous Coward]

Eh, not necessarily. Each one of those has a computer onboard and communications gear. With the right software package you've got a huge, orbiting Beowulf cluster. The control will come after the self-awareness in any case.

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[Anonymous Coward]

>they didn't put it in control of anything, and it doesn't have any neural net capabilities.

except that it is a Military satellite, not like they would lie about what is on it for some reason, like say, national security.

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[mjwx]

Admittedly, it's funny, but it's really just a communications satellite; they didn't put it in control of anything, and it doesn't have any neural net capabilities.

Thats what they want you to think.

Self-Aware?

[Enkrypter]

All I want to know is: How much time do I have to work on my doomsday shelter before Skynet becomes self-aware?

You want scary?

[Captain DaFt]

here's a few quotes from BBC:
"Software on the launch vehicle did not behave normally during a test sequence."
"The new system will enable British forces to make use of next-generation weapons systems, such as the recently introduced Reaper drones."
"This is made possible only by Skynet's ability to handle the drones' real-time video feeds."
Source: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7419751.stm [bbc.co.uk]
The only thing to add is... BOO!

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[colmore]

Man when the robot missiles, lasers, drones, battle droids, nanogoo whatever does finally decide to kill us all is anyone... I mean ANYONE going to be able to say with a straight face (before they too are claimed) that we didn't see this coming?

I for one, despise our future mechanical overlords and pledge myself to the resistance.