China Worried About Terrorist Pigeons

An anonymous reader writes: A pleasant event was planned for the 65th anniversary of the founding of the People's Republic of China. A ceremony at Tiananmen Square would release 10,000 pigeons at sunrise to symbolize an era of peace. Unfortunately, even symbols of peace can apparently remind people of violence. Chinese authorities searched all 10,000 pigeons for "dangerous materials," after the government was concerned they might be used for attacks. The pigeons' feathers were checked, and they were given a cavity search as well. The reports did not indicate what kind of "dangerous materials" these pigeons might be carrying. It's unclear whether any pigeons disclosed terror plots under interrogation.

Re:

[biptoe]

A helmet full of Oatmeal and Nekkid Bea Arthur pictures!!!!!

Can they search the pigeons where I live?

[jd2112]

They always seem to be dropping 'dangerous materials' on my car...

Re:

[FatdogHaiku]

It's all a smoke screen. Some guy was caught screwing pigeons and had to come up with a story...

pigeon holed

[schlachter]

the authorities didn't want to do they cavity search, they were worried it would pigeon hole their career.

Re:

[Anonymous Coward]

Cornholio only wants to wipe his ass. He doesn't want it to be fucked.

Re:

[Skiboy941]

Dammit, you made me spit out my cereal.

Re:pigeon holed

[TheCarp]

However, this time it was based on a credible threat of reports of pidgeons overheard shortly before the event exclaiming "Coup! Coup!"

SubjectsInCommentsAreStupid

[lesincompetent]

Somebody suddenly remembered project X-Ray during WW2?

Re:

[ameen.ross]

Can you please stop writing "SubjectsInCommentsAreStupid" as the title of your comment? You're only making it worse. Thx

Not helping the problem either

[cdrudge]

Because a subject of "Re: SubjectsinCommentsAreStupid" isn't continuing to make it worse?

Re:

[lesincompetent]

I don't want to break my comment up to fill that stupid space and since you cannot leave it empty at least i entertain myself in "protesting" that way.

Re:

[Java Pimp]

The titles remain as a throwback to Usenet discussion threads. Mainly because Slashdot users refuse to leave that era and progress with the rest of the world. We fear change. Take the current uproar over Beta for instance. I remember a similar uproar the last time Slashdot had a major overhaul (which really wasn't all that major).

Re:

[LifesABeach]

Then when we place a "#" in the title will it modern?

Re:

[NoImNotNineVolt]

There's nothing modern about IRC channel names.

Re:

[blackraven14250]

The change to the current system was relatively minor - it was still highly usable, even though it was different. The beta site in its original state, though, was very much less usable than the current incarnation of /. . Looking it over now, it seems like they listened to what people were saying, and changed comments for the better. At least in my view, the atrocious comment layout was the main problem with beta, with some of the other information density weirdness coming in just behind it.

Re:

[lesincompetent]

In what way i'm making it worse? Oh and off topic, BTW.

Carrying?

[dbarron]

I wonder how many were found to be carrying during the cavity search ?

Re:

[Anonymous Coward]

Pigeons have been flying into buildings since long before 9/11. It took some brilliant Islamic engineering to scale and adapt the concept to utilize airliners.

Re:

[kruach aum]

In many languages there's only one word for both doves and pigeons. In Dutch it's both duif, in German it's both Taube, in Japanese it's both hato, etc.

Re:

[ShanghaiBill]

In many languages there's only one word for both doves and pigeons.

In Chinese, there is no difference between a pigeon and a dove. Both are "gezi". Isn't a dove just a white pigeon?

Re:

[ArcadeMan]

And I suppose a polar bear is just a bear on a tropical island?

Re:

[Anonymous Coward]

A polar bear on a tropical island is probably a dead bear.

Re:

[Talderas]

It's probably an experiment and you're fucked.

Re:

[pla]

In many languages there's only one word for both doves and pigeons. In Dutch it's both duif, in German it's both Taube, in Japanese it's both hato, etc.

...While in English, we have two equally nonspecific words for the same group of birds.

Taxonomically, doves and pigeons don't refer to distinct species, they both refer to any of hundreds of members of the family Columbidae. At best, you can say that doves "tend" to look smaller and lighter-colored

For the car analogy, we tend to refer to the largest

Re:

[Russ1642]

I thought doves were pigeons. Just white flying rats instead of grey flying rats.

Re:

[the monolith]

Doves have good PR and were mentioned in early literature too, so they are way ahead of the 'Greater Spotted Flying Rat' variety.

Someone cavity searched 10,000 pigeons?

[nwaack]

I knew a lot of jobs in China were pretty crappy, but I think this one takes the cake!

Re:

[TheRealSteveDallas]

Nah. It's cool. We get to keep whatever we find.

70% terrorist

[Nauglamir]

Those things are dangerous! Whose idea was to release 10,000 autonomous[1], un-manned[2], 0.7 liter[3] bags of Dihydrogen monoxide [wikipedia.org] . Surely a terrorist plot. Even without adding fluoride to the already deadly compound.
[1] Unless trained
[2] I sincerely hope, but who am I to judge people's tendencies
[3] Assuming 1 kg average weight, 70% water mass

Re:

[LifesABeach]

I was just thinking that it would be a great way to check the tracking software, have the computer just track the birds. 10,000 is about the number of a military division.

Avian carriers

[RDW]

What the Chinese authorities missed is that this event was being used as cover for circumventing the Great Firewall of China using RFC 1149: http://www.faqs.org/rfcs/rfc11... [faqs.org]

Re:

[Errol backfiring]

Indeed. The Chinese authorities should have shaved the pigeon's heads, like the Romans did (important messages were tattooed on a slave's head, and a week or so later it was overgrown enough to send him on his way).

A few random pigeon subjects ...

[CaptainDork]

... were selected for statistical analysis to determine if any of their solid waste contained harmful bio-terrorists components.

Each in the small sample were banded as stool pigeons.

Hatoful Boyfriend

[hort_wort]

Someone in China must have played it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v... [youtube.com]

Unintended symbolism?

[clickety6]

Who could miss the symbolism of 10,000 pigeons shitting on the citizens gathered in the square.

Re:

[LifesABeach]

Damn! Coffee all over the keyboard! XD

What's even funnier is the birds circle till they get their bearings.

Oh no pigeons

[kav2k]

The (late) Pictures For Sad Children had a very relevant comic [googleusercontent.com].

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Color coded scare-o-meters are useless...

[denzacar]

Hell, we once had a color coded scare-o-meter to tell people how nervous they should feel on any given day.

They should be numerically graded.

How else are we to know EXACTLY how nervous we should be?

Homeland Security Alert Color Burnt Sienna

[wiredog]

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!

Re:

[anagama]

Exactly. Don't forget the war on toiletries in baggage. Or how something is OK when the US Federal Govt does it, for example, the way waterboarding is called torture only when done by other governments.

So, not long ago, America's major newspapers basically decided that waterboarding was somehow okay. American waterboarding, that is! In the same time frame, the same newspapers made it clear that if any other country practiced waterboarding, it was torture.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/... [huffingtonpost.com]

This sort of "Laug

Re:

[Squidlips]

That is Boston and its beloved, if cretinous, mayor, Mumble Menino so don't project this city to the whole country. Not every city (except Providence) promotes its barely literate chauffeure driver to Mayor, but we had someone smart in there, they might uncover the dirt.

Re:

[djbckr]

I remember when the color-coded scare-o-meter played at the airports: "The current threat level is Orange". And every time I heard it I thought to myself, "... and it will never change". Turns out I was right.

Harvey Birdman - Blackwatch Plaid

[waspleg]

This came out around the time that they had the color coded system. [adultswim.com]

Great series, ended because Steven Colbert got his own show (he's Ken Seben - Harvey's boss) ;/

Re:

[umghhh]

This is called progress....

LOL ...

[gstoddart]

The pigeons' feathers were checked, and they were given a cavity search as well.

Worst ... job ... ever.

"Oh, hey honey, how was your day at work?"
"You know, the usual, stuck my finger into a couple hundred pigeons, just like every other day."
"*sigh* Looks like I need to clean the poop off your uniform again"

Did they check for bird flu?

[Ungrounded Lightning]

Seems like a big flock of pigeons over a big crowd would be an effective way to spread a virus that is contagious between birds and people.

Don't worry about Ebola, though. It doesn't do "airborne transmission". (Yet.)

Hmmm ...

[gstoddart]

A ceremony at Tiananmen Square would release 10,000 pigeons at sunrise to symbolize an era of peace.

I wonder if any appreciates the dichotomy of those two things.

Because, it's not exactly true.

The Cultural revolution wasn't exactly a shining moment. Or the other reason Tiananmen Square is famous. Or many other things that's happened over the last 6 decades.

It's not fun to be a symbol of peace

[XNormal]

In 1988 Korean pigeons had a different unpleasant experience [youtube.com] at the Seoul olympic games opening ceremony.

Re:

[antdude]

They look like doves to me. RIP to the fired birds.

Re:

[unitron]

"Dont you move !"
"And put your wings up so I can see them" - Jack Bauer

[timidvoice] Aflac? [/timidvoice]

Two words...

[war4peace]

Pigeon Molesters!

I put the speaker in iPhones, what do you do?

[Snotnose]

I stick my finger up pigeons butts.

BS sense is tingling!

[GameboyRMH]

My BS meter is immediately going off because:

- It's a story about how crazy the Chinese government is, this topic is prime BS news breeding ground
- It's a little too good to be true
- Many sources have deleted the news, current source is "Agencies."

I fully expect to get the full story in the next Cracked.com BS news roundup.

This is silly

[WillAffleckUW]

Everyone knows we're using lab rats.

Only a gullible fool would believe we would use pigeons.

They're just re-enforcing the Great Firewall

[wiredog]

To resist RFC-1149 [ietf.org].

Yay! US Government Not the Only Paranoids

[sudon't]

As a US citizen, it makes me feel better to know other governments are just as ridiculously paranoid as ours. Let someone else's government take a turn being the World's laughingstock. I care not one whit whether the pigeons actually had their little assholes probed. That is the story, and I'm sticking with it.

Haha, China!

In times of universal deceit, telling the truth is

[bussdriver]

Pigeons can send messages!

In times of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
-Orwell.

Depends upon the times, but revolutionaries are also terrorists.

I wouldn't want to be the guy who had to spend days probing bird anuses.

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Four Lions finally released in China?

[Triklyn]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?... [youtube.com]

brother pigeon.

Pigeons could be drones

[AxeTheMax]

Whether this story is true or not, one thing is certain, the next time there is a land battle between two technologically advanced armies, they will shoot every bird out of the sky in case it is an enemy drone. A major land war could be another significant extinction event for wildlife. Rats and cockroaches will survive of course.

Please tell me

[fredrated]

this is from the Onion.

Really ?

[Darth_Kedar]

Dangerous items came from the end of the barrel from the government at the same square, not from the end of pigeons.

Nab Them! Jab them! Tab them! Grab them!

[RevWaldo]

We brrringBOINGWHOOSH search-o-missile at the pigeons and grrripSRPOINGAIYIYIYIYzoomazoomazooma endoscopic camera MIRVs and ZWOOSHowieowieowieSPLAT no more terrorist threat!

.

don't they mean pheasant? :-)

[River of Souls]

A pleasant event... don't they mean a pheasant event? :-)

*ducks*