Woman Claims Wii Fit Caused Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome 380
Amanda Flowers always liked her Wii Fit but now she can't get enough of it. Amanda claims a fall from her balance board damaged a nerve and has left her suffering from persistent sexual arousal syndrome. From the article: "The catering worker said: 'It began as a twinge down below before surging through my body. Sometimes it built up into a trembling orgasm.' A doctor diagnosed her with persistent sexual arousal syndrome due to a damaged nerve."
I might be able to help (Score:5, Funny)
> Single Amanda, 24, from Harpurhey, Manchester,
Dear Amanda,
Please contact me offline. Although I will be straight forward and admit right away that I can't cure you, I still have something that might help you live an happier life with the syndrome.
Truly yours,
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Funny)
No need to worry, this will be sorted out once she contacts me offline. I will ask her how much progress she had made so far with the Wii Fit, purely for diagnostic related reasons, of course.
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2, Funny)
More importantly, I need steps to replicate. Now please excuse me, as I'm off to buy my wife a Wii Fit board as a just because present.
My ex-wife developed the exact opposite of this syndrome. Shortly after we returned from the Honeymoon.
=P
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Funny)
That was all explained in the handbook "Guide to human nature" that you were supplied at birth. You did read it, right?
Once the honeymoon is over, the honeymoon is really over. It's time to start spending money on "the other woman" or an escort.
{sigh} I wish more people would read the handbook so they wouldn't be surprised when the inevitable happens.
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Insightful)
You obviously didn't read the footnote, that says "but really, if that happens then you're doing it wrong".
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Some chicks are into body mods. Tattoos, piercings, permanent vibrator implants. It takes all kinds.
Hmmm, the possibilities I can think of.
Gimme a remote control on that thing. Kinda like a wireless butterfly (look it up if you don't know), but better. :)
Re:I might be able to help (Score:5, Insightful)
I know it does. A friend got one for her birthday once, with explicit instructions to don it immediately.
The remote was passed around the party.
She soon developed an amusing twitch in her conversations...
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Everyone thinks the installment plan is cheaper but they don't read the fine print. Pay as you go will save you money and will get you a much better product.
Re: (Score:2, Funny)
>>> I still have something that might help you live an happier life with the syndrome.
>>I don't know dude. I didn't see any picture.
>No need to worry, this will be sorted out once she contacts me offline.
Sounds more like the poster meant picture of what you're offering.
Re: (Score:2)
So how ugly and unarousing are you?
Her problem is that she is aroused too much not that she is having trouble getting aroused.
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
I hate to brag... (Score:3, Funny)
I have also been known to cause persistent sexual arousal syndrome (PSAS) in females of the opposite sex.
It's been my cross to bear since I was in the fifth grade and had to fight off Miss DeLisi, my teacher, who looked a lot like a young Kelly LeBrock.
It's only gotten worse since I became a professional golfer. I've learned to deal with it by lowering my standards way, way down.
Queue the same joke over and over... (Score:4, Insightful)
"nice"
Re:Queue the same joke over and over... (Score:4, Funny)
Well, right it out a hundred times by sun-up or we'll cut your balls off.
Hail Caesar!
Re:Queue the same joke over and over... (Score:4, Funny)
Oh fuck, write.
Sigh, some mornings it pays not to post to /.
Let's just rephrase this (Score:5, Funny)
Woman Claims Nerve Damage Caused Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome. Doctors Unsurprised.
Woman Further Claims That Falling On The Floor Can Cause Nerve Damage. Doctors Still Unsurprised.
Woman Then Observes That Balancing On A Small Piece Of Plastic Can Result In Falling On The Floor. Doctors Remain Unsurprised.
Hey, you know what else can "cause" persistent sexual arousal syndrome? Basically anything.
Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
Woman Claims Nerve Damage Caused Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome. Doctors Unsurprised.
Woman Further Claims That Falling On The Floor Can Cause Nerve Damage. Doctors Still Unsurprised.
Woman Then Observes That Balancing On A Small Piece Of Plastic Can Result In Falling On The Floor. Doctors Remain Unsurprised.
Hey, you know what else can "cause" persistent sexual arousal syndrome? Basically anything.
Have some compassion.
Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome [wikipedia.org] is very real. Imagine having an itch that you could never scratch away. An itch that was always there. Now, replace that itch with an erection and a desire to release your semen storage 24/7.
I went through 4 years of it in high-school, and would not wish it upon my worst enemy.
Re:Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
We all went through it through high school. It's called adolescence.
Re: (Score:2, Informative)
We all went through it through high school. It's called adolescence.
*woooooosh*
Re:Have some compassion (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
So you chose your screen name fittingly, I see.
Re:Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
Dude.... (Score:2)
you really need to get laid...
Re:29 years/old here. I have PTSD from High School (Score:4, Funny)
Think about this for a moment: Your mum probably likes it up the ass occasionally. Did that make you angry? That's because you think of her as some magical ideal, and not as a living breathing passionate person who gave birth to you after a lot of passionate sex.
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
I read that post (probably by the same author as the GGP) long enough to say:
What the shit?
God damn, people, different people have different libidos. We don't have to kill each other over it.
except (Score:3, Funny)
different people have different libidos. We don't have to kill each other over it.
Killing is unavoidable for necrophiliacs with persistent arousal syndrome...
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
... in the future of USA and the world, there are more STD's from your disgraceful behaviour now in your time then there ever was in 30 years ago ...
This is Slashdot. Around here, an STD should be worn like a medal. "Hey, guys, I've had sex, AND I can prove it!"
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Women have erections?!?
I really want to know where you grew up, so I can avoid women from there!
Re:Have some compassion (Score:5, Funny)
Now, replace that itch with an erection and a desire to release your semen storage 24/7.
Sounds just like being a dude to me.
Re: (Score:2)
Anything but dating a slashdotter.
Re: (Score:2)
So you're saying that the first poster really would help her, just not in the way he intended.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
"Woman Claims Nerve Damage Caused Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome. Doctors Unsurprised.
Woman Further Claims That Falling On The Floor Can Cause Nerve Damage. Doctors Still Unsurprised.
Woman Then Observes That Balancing On A Small Piece Of Plastic Can Result In Falling On The Floor. Doctors Remain Unsurprised.
Hey, you know what else can "cause" persistent sexual arousal syndrome? NOT ENOUGH."
Fixed that for you.
Worst Source Ever (Score:4, Insightful)
The Star? Come on, really?
Why not the National Enquirer? Or the Globe?
Re:Worst Source Ever (Score:5, Insightful)
I think that story is one of the best examples of British tabloid journalism you'll find. It's almost perfectly written, in fact.
Base, trashy and possibly bollocks. You can only find this high quality of bullshit in the British press. It's just got more...style.
Quick! (Score:5, Funny)
Then she'll be horny *and* talk dirty all the time.
Re:Quick! (Score:5, Funny)
Priceless.
This just in: (Score:2)
Dr. Mario will be "administrating" the cure.
for sure (Score:5, Funny)
Single Amanda, 24, from Harpurhey, Manchester,...
She won't be single for long.
Re: (Score:2)
Re:for sure (Score:5, Funny)
Yeah, I don't know about you, but that sounds like a full time fucking job...
My wife asked for one for her birthday... (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Not me. My wife can already run circles around me when it comes to "persistent sexual arousal."
And the worst part is that she's been out of action since her C-section 4 weeks ago. When the doctor gives her the OK, I'm *so* dead.
Not that I mind *too* much. ;)
Re:My wife asked for one for her birthday... (Score:5, Funny)
Was just going to say, I know what Mrs. corbettw is getting this year! A trip to Mexico for herself, while my girlfriend gets one of these things!
Woman has Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome... (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
It's called summer in Canada. The girls here waste no time in peeling the layers off. It is magnificent.
Seriously, this is the Daily Star we're talking about here. "Hopefully one day I’ll find a superstud who can satisfy me." Uh-huh. Why is this news on Slashdot, again? oh wait...
Now comes the obligatory ... (Score:2, Insightful)
Woman Claims Wii Fit Caused Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome
And now the obligatory: Correlation doesn't mean causation.
Re: (Score:2, Informative)
It is called the post hoc ergo propter hoc fallacy.
Correlation doesn't mean causation is better applied to statistical measurements rather than single incidents IMO.
Plus or minus? (Score:2, Insightful)
The question is whether to post warning or pitch it as a benefit of using the Wii Fit. With the right ad they could be harder to find than a Tickle Me Elmo.
Re: (Score:2)
Like the warnings about erections lasting longer than four hours. That must have shaken loose a bunch of fence sitters.
Not crazy (Score:2)
This is definitely possible. I don't understand the slightly derogatory tone in the article/summary.
And the Wii Fit didn't cause the injury, a fall did.
Seriously, come on Slashdot. A stupid article summarized stupidly. This is no different than if she had bumped a knee and damaged a nerve, and was left with minor parasthesia (pins and needles).
Oh, it's samzenpus. Carry on.
ot: what's with all the stupid stories today?
Re: (Score:2, Insightful)
This is definitely possible. I don't understand the slightly derogatory tone in the article/summary.
Well, the derogatory tone in the article is par for the course for this particular rag. I think there is some kind of a rule that the Daily Star, the Daily Mail and a few others have to publish at least one perpetual arousal symptom story per month (the sufferer is always young, female and unattached). Then there is the story about the adulterer, from the mistress' point of view but trashing her nevertheless, the fat lady trying every diet possible story... etc. These stories are all pretty sordid, sad and
Oh my god!! (Score:5, Funny)
if(sleeping){
wakeup();
else
panic();
}
Re:Oh my god!! (Score:5, Insightful)
You need one more of these:
}
hmm (Score:3, Funny)
Taking the braces off is a good first step to resolving the particular issue, though....
Re: (Score:2)
That wasn't the only exception thrown in that snippet.
Re: (Score:2, Insightful)
if(Slashdot && Vaginas){
if(sleeping){
wakeup();
}
else{
panic();
}
}
There, FTFY.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Proving how important it is to Open Source your code
Wii fit caused? (Score:5, Informative)
The board would cause a concussion as well if I hit someone over the head with it.
This is hardly news, or related to Wii fit.
Clumsy woman falls down and hurts herself, stop the presses!
Bodily fluids? (Score:3, Interesting)
Brilliant advertising by Nintendo (Score:2)
I'm sure that Apple, MS and various others will get on board.
It's been known for a long time though that woman who use linux are hotter than most. I'll testify to that plus the fact that when a woman I'm dating uses Linux , I want to mow her lawn , pay her bills, vacuum, and do dishes. Linux is evil?
But who can I sue.
All I can say is... (Score:4, Interesting)
Re: (Score:2)
Is she really complaining or is she bragging like Sally Albright in the restaurant?
After googling that, I'm convinced that you must have believed that you were posting here [oxygen.com]. This is Slashdot. Nerds, and whatnot. Sorry.
So let me get this straight (Score:2, Funny)
You suffer from persistent sexual arousal symptom?
Cure for PSAS in Women Known for Years (Score:2)
Persistant sexual arousal... (Score:2)
Too many? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Too many? (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2, Funny)
"Oh god no! please not another one! stop! stop! get off me! oh god, oh god, no! stop! not another one!..."
etc.
Re:Too many? (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2)
Must just be you... I have to listen to women complaining about having too many orgasms all the time!
Let me guess, you sell vibrators too.
Re: (Score:2)
So.. you're a rapist?
Yeeeessss (Score:2)
I am headed out to buy a couple of dozen Wii fit boards for my wife.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
No that would be called a zero sum game, nothing lost for trying.
I'm not sure I trust this "News" source... (Score:2)
...I mean, the word "News" really is in scare quotes on their "More 'News' Here..." button. And that's considering that there's just one source, and British newspapers make things up [psychologytoday.com].
Shenanigans (Score:2)
I refuse to believe this story until I have this woman's phone number and street address.
And a photo.
I know the feeling. (Score:4, Funny)
Only men could find humor in this article (Score:4, Insightful)
A. Redundant.
Slashdot to the rescue (Score:4, Funny)
I bet once she sees some Slashdotters, any sexual arousal she might suffer from will quickly recede.
A paradigm shift in Kung Foo techniques (Score:2)
If you thought the Touch of Death was hardcore you ain't seen nothin yet!
In other words... (Score:5, Funny)
"Wii so horny".
The most important question (Score:2)
is WHERE did she hurt herself when she fell... and how may I injure someone else in the same way?
um, (Score:3, Funny)
This is such a blatant SLASHVERTISEMENT!!!
This is no joke. (Score:3, Funny)
The cure for persistent sexual arousal syndrome (Score:5, Funny)
The cure for persistent sexual arousal syndrome in women is:
Wedding cake.
But, but, it's quality journalism (Score:5, Funny)
How Jeremy Clarkson has a 10 inch dick [dailystar.co.uk]
How Katie Price's tits could explode during her diving holiday [dailystar.co.uk]
or
That Skinny Women really don't want to get fat [dailystar.co.uk]
m( - Facepalm emoticon
Re: (Score:2)
-1 Nauseating.
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
-1 Nauseating.
Depends on your point of view I guess. Personally, I think if you haven't broken furniture at least once you're not doing it right.
Re:Hold on (Score:5, Funny)
-1 Nauseating.
Depends on your point of view I guess. Personally, I think if you haven't broken furniture at least once you're not doing it right.
*Puh-lease*. This is Slashdot.
If you haven't caused a data center to fail over, you're not doing it right...
Re:Hold on (Score:5, Funny)
*Puh-lease*. This is Slashdot.
If you haven't gotten head while tanking a raid boss at least once you're not doing it right.
Fixed. True story.
Re:Hold on (Score:5, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Uhm, wait a second, this is Slashdot, we aren't supposed to talk about how we meet lovely women and sleep with them
What is this "women" thing of which you speak?
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Why? It seems most people come here in their work time, so having a wife/girlfriend or not should really make a difference. Unless having a wife/gf changes nerds habits and they start logging to Facebook and growing virtual carrots instead of logging to /. and make ignorant rants.
I usually log on to /. during classes, so my time for socializing isn't affected.
Re:Hold on (Score:5, Insightful)
Sheesh, get a room. Nobody wants to know about you and your RealDoll.
Re:Hold on (Score:4, Informative)
Hopefully one day I’ll find a superstud who can satisfy me.
Ah now I understand... The old I-want-sex-all-the-time trick to get men.
Maybe. However, It is a real thing [wikipedia.org], and from what I understand is debilitating, humiliating, and doesn't necessarily lead to the woman becoming a nympho.
In fact, I'm kind of surprised -- even on Slashdot, I'd expect someone to have picked that up somewhere, rather than just assuming this is a good thing. That seems a bit on par with taking advantage of someone's mental disorder...
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
And now the slightest of vibrations, from mobile phones to food processors, turns her on.
It's more severe than I thought. She's turning into a teenage boy.
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
He was happy for the first few days. Now he's just desperate for a good night's sleep.