North Korea Announces Achieving Nuclear Fusion 372
aftertaf writes "North Korea claims to have achieved nuclear fusion by building what it describes as a 'unique thermo-nuclear reaction device.' This announcement was met by skepticism on just about every news website this side of Saturn. Pyongyang claims its latest scientific breakthrough coincides with the birthday of the country's founder and eternal president Kim Il-sung. This is not the first time it seems that the laws of nature have been bent in his honor. According to official biographies, when his son, Kim Jong-il, was born, a new star appeared in the sky." No doubt the Dear Leader combined the atomic nuclei by hand.
In related news (Score:3, Funny)
The mothers of both Martin Fleischmann and Stanley Pons received Mother's Day card from their sons postmarked Pyongyang.
Fusion is easy. (Score:5, Informative)
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that's actually not that difficult at all. Hydrogen bombs are uncontrolled fusion in action. Now, producing usable energy, however...
Well, according to the BBC article it says they build a "unique thermo-nuclear reaction device". Technically, NK could be referring to a hydrogen bomb.
Re:Fusion is easy. (Score:4, Interesting)
I've got my own fusion reactor. I recover energy from it with photovoltaic cells on the top of my house.
Re:In related news (Score:4, Interesting)
Actually, I read an interview of a British researcher that has been studying North Korea for decades and has been there several times. He says that North Korea is actually a fascist country. Their system is based on an almost religious cult for the Dear Leader and racist belief in the superiority of the Korean race. Communism is only in outgoing propaganda. They carefully craft some propaganda in Korean only for their own use, and a different one in English to show to the world.
I wish I could post a link to the interview, I can't remember it. Very interesting, it made my chin fall a few times.
Why is Kim Jong IL... (Score:4, Funny)
Always impersonating that guy from MAD TV??
It's Cold Fusion! (Score:3, Funny)
We know North Korea hasn't released any very hot vaporware lately, so obviously they've perfected Cold Fusion!
Re:It's Cold Fusion! (Score:4, Funny)
I was just going to say, why is this on "idle?" This is HUGE news!
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Yeah! The secret is: two cups; one battery!
Not a star ... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not a star ... (Score:5, Funny)
ROR!!!
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Re:Parked? (Score:4, Informative)
Of course, that would make it a bit too conspicuous to be a good spy satellite.
In addition, even the ultra-high-resolution cameras in spy satellites would probably not be of that much use from geostationary orbit (GEO), since GEO is very far away (~36,000 km). Spy satellites are likely put in a polar Low Earth Orbit (LEO) at approx. 200 km altitude. This gives much more detailed images, and also allows the satellite to cover the entire Earth without spending any fuel.
Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Informative)
You could build the equipment [wikipedia.org] yourself.
Getting more energy out of fusion than you put in... that's the hard part.
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This was my thought--so what if they did? We did it more than 50 years ago, the Teller-Ulam designed warhead dates to 1951. Fusing two atoms is trivial.
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it just takes a fission to get the fuse lit...
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The Teller-Ulam design uses that, but a basic particle accelerator would work too.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Interesting)
it just takes a fission to get the fuse lit...
Not even. Read the GP's wiki link for a description of a "Farnsworth fusor" (not the Farnsworth you're thinking of, but rather his namesake). Making fusion reactions occur is trivially easy, to the point where there exists at least one hobbyist who's made a fusor in his basement. Betcha that's what NK has built, and the claim of it being a "unique thermo-nuclear reaction device" was likely tacked on by some lackey in the propaganda department. Again, old news in the fusion world, as fusors aren't useful for much other than proof of concept.
Getting a net gain in energy with a fusion reaction? Hard. The only way we've done it to date is in a thermonuclear warhead, and I guarantee Pyongyang doesn't have one of those yet, since they've had enough trouble getting basic fission bombs built.
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On contrary, I think that is is "wink wink, nudge nudge, btw we have H-bombs now, beware cowards!" anouncement.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Insightful)
Nah, they wouldn't be that subtle. Recall that they made a big fuss over "we have the bomb now", only to have their first actual test detonation fizzle.
Besides, if they were testing H-bombs, there would be third party confirmation. They cannot set off a nuke, never mind a big nuke, without setting off seismic detectors from India to California.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Funny)
Your stupid Earth mind cannot conceive power of Kim Il Sung Juche Physics.
Unless you send FIVE (5) million tonnes of rice, TEN POINT TWO (10.2) million tonnes of kimchi, FIFTY FOUR POINT SIX (54.6) million tonnes of ramen now you will be destroyed by my Solanite bombs.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Funny)
HELLO
We name is PRINCE WUNDAI, my family is ONE OF the largest farmer in Nigeria. Father was captured by Warlord who is trying to steal our family fortune. To secure our family, decided we are to looking for a country we can trust to help us smuggle the grain to a safe location.
We picked your country, NORTH KOREA, because of your honest reputation. We'd like to offer you 50% (HALF) of the grain for your help in securing the rest against warlords and USA aggression.
The grain is packed on ships, waiting on the name of a port to deliver it to.
We need only small bribes for the Somalian pirates to let our ships pass, and we will be on our way.
Please help us, KIM JONG IL
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It's also possible they've assembled one of Bussard's whiffleball fusors [rexresearch.com]. Not tremendously complicated, and if you threw a couple hundred million at it (assuming the theory behind it were correct) you might get a practical reactor.
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“Useless energy” is best illustrated by what you just expended by typing that rant.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Funny)
This was my thought--so what if they did? We did it more than 50 years ago, the Teller-Ulam designed warhead dates to 1951. Fusing two atoms is trivial.
Hey, let's not burden the journalists with dry facts.
Cool! I'm getting a home unit. (Score:3, Funny)
They *laughed* when I said my Christmas decorations would wow them this year!
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As you say. I RTFA and it hardly made any claim, except perhaps optimism. Even in US advertising, puffery is not actionable.
But I recalling hearing there were perhaps a 100 sort of credible low-cost approaches. Pick one, spend a million dollars, and you could have scientific feasibility. I suspect their cost structure is different than ours, so they could have tried a number of approaches. Given that they did nukes, I am not sure really poor need be a big thing to get to feasibility. But whoever in th
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I wounder if they actually funded a Polywell reactor? If so someone needs to slap around the DOE and DOD.
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:5, Funny)
Actually at the next press announcement they are going to show the actual device, but they have to wait for it to rise first.
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Actually, that's also possible [wikipedia.org]. In theory [wikipedia.org], it could even be done without a fission primary.
Now, doing it in a controlled and sustained way, that's a bit more difficult [wikipedia.org].
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I was going to say, why is everyone laughing this off? It's very unlikely to be true. But we seem to be laughing at it because "our scientists are obviously better than their scientists."
Yes, it's probably BS. But it isn't BS until it is disproven. And yes, there isn't anything there to disprove right now. And sure, we haven't been able to achieve net positive fusion yet. Net negative fusion is pretty easy. I wouldn't expect useful fusion to be achieved by the old methods. I would expect it to come
Re:Fusion isn't hard. (Score:4, Insightful)
Duke Nukem Forever Released (Score:5, Funny)
In North Korea, anything is possible.
In other news... (Score:5, Funny)
In other news, power in Pyongyang will only be available from 5:00 - 7:00 PM this week in celebration of the achievement.
Re:In other news... (Score:5, Funny)
you mean : in celebration of the achievement, power WILL be available from 5:00 - 7:00 PM this week !!
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He is small enough to do it. (Score:5, Funny)
No doubt that he is small enough to have done it.
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Of course, his cute little puppet hands would do the trick. Being created by those wacky South Park Puppeteers Matt Stein and Trey Parkhurst has its advantages. Team America, although huge dicks, should be alerted post haste!
In other news; I have just perfected Quantum Computing and the language of the Quantum Computer; QBasic, but am waiting to announce it on my birthday. We are still trying to license Q-Bert for our mascot. Stay tuned and subscribe to my newsletterings!
Doesn't the star count (Score:5, Funny)
I figured he would have took credit for creating fusion when that new star appeared when his son was born.
Already done (Score:2, Interesting)
Where does he find the time? (Score:4, Funny)
If he can do nuclear fusion as well, then perhaps his talents truly are limitless.
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Clones.
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I thought the dear leader was busy flying fighter jets, memorizing phone books, breaking golf records, and leading the NBA in rebounding.
No, you've got that wrong. Kim Il-sung is only in second place for NBA rebounds.
Don't Discriminate! (Score:5, Funny)
>> This announcement was met by skepticism on just about every news website this side of Saturn.
Sure! Make it sound like we on the other side of Saturn will believe anything. That's planetism sir!
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This side of Saturn's orbit.
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technically, Saturn is *never* on this side of Saturn.
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Half of it must be. And if you don't look, the probability wave of which half it is won't collapse, so the two halves are equally on the other side.
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Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
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Technically it's hemispherism.
What if.. (Score:5, Interesting)
For some reason I can't help but think that it would be hilarious and kind of scary if everyone chuckles a bit at this and in a couple of months news reports come in saying that for some strange reason the long-running North Korean energy crisis seems to have been solved...
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... by all the American stomachs roasted by the mujahedeen in Hell....
Oh, wait, that's from another regime's ministry of information.
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This is pretty much how we'll know. (Score:2)
If North Korea's done this in any meaningful way, then their economic troubles are over. They won't be asking for aid or concessions, they'll be getting rich selling energy and possibly even technology. They won't be testing missiles, they'll be developing frickin' laser beams.
I have my doubts, though.
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North Korean energy solution (Score:5, Funny)
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Of course, they didn't invent it, but if.......
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In point of fact, they did a long time ago.
North Korean energy crisis solved! (Score:2)
There was a small problem with reactor. There is no more North Korea. Film at 11. Now, the latest sports scores. Back to you Mike!
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For some reason I can't help but think that it would be hilarious and kind of scary if everyone chuckles a bit at this and in a couple of months news reports come in saying that for some strange reason the long-running North Korean energy crisis seems to have been solved...
Well, North Koren could release another news report saying just that very thing and if nothing else satellite imagery could verify at least that much of the story by looking at North Korea at night.
But anyway, if they were able to do it, which I doubt, that would mean that it definitely can be done, it's just a matter of figuring out how to do it. Right now nobody knows if it's really even possible to do it or not. The main surprise to me is that they didn't give the Dear Leader credit for the breakt
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I think it's more likely we'll have a bunch of confused North Koreans who don't understand why the rest of the world does not believe all the great things their "dear leader" has done - and probably alot of cults that try to spread their Kim-jong-il beliefs to "save" everyone.
Low tech but effective (Score:3, Funny)
The breakthrough was made with a hammer and a small amount of nitroglycerin. The reaction released a great deal of energy and as soon as they can aford a new hammer they hope to continue testing.
It's just kimchi and soju . . . (Score:3, Funny)
. . . eat and drink enough of that, and your breath can cause nuclear fusion.
. . . and you don't even want to know about "The Day After" . . .
. . . that picture is not a fake . . . Mr. Kim has just "let one rip" . . .
Great (Score:2)
I can live with that, but I really want to know where I can buy a pair of those glasses. It was only a month ago when they revealed that Kim Jong Il was setting fashion trends around the world [abcnews.com], so I'd like to sport those glasses. The retro aviator style glasses are out, Kim Jong Il's glasses are IN.
The nose knows (Score:2)
Low budget (Score:2)
If you listen to some people, the west has been wasting a lot of money on things like ITER, when some cheaper, less brute-force, approaches could work better. If they're right, then a country that doesn't have the resources to try the large-scale experiments might have more success.
On the other hand, given the veracity of past press releases from North Korea, this reactor might be powered by powdered unicorn.
Star at birth (Score:5, Interesting)
In ancient Greece and Rome, it wasn't unusual for someone to claim either that a new star appeared in the sky to herald a great person's birth or that they became a star following their death. This latter claim is known as catasterism and was pretty popular from the time of the Hellenistic kings to the Julio-Claudian dynasty at Rome.
Catasterism is a frequent subject on coin portraits, with a star positioned about the portrait of the ruler. There is a very famous series of coins depicting Augustus fastening a star above the head of Marcellus, the man he had hoped would succeed him.
Of course the import of all of this is that, as with so much else, North Korea is about 2,000 years behind the times.
Re:Thus the star over Bethlehem then (Score:5, Interesting)
I know this is going to offend some people, but since most of the mythology around Jesus Christ is already borrowed from other mythological traditions, I expect that this is the origin of the Star of Bethlehem that is supposed to have appeared over Joshua Bar Joseph's birthplace when he was born. It would make sense for early Christians to have borrowed this story as well if it would help make their religion more popular with the Romano-Graecian population in the near east.
"offend some people." Ya think? (Score:3, Funny)
The second-most popular Christmas story after Santa Claus was nonsense PR spin?
Gee, why leave it half done? Got any gay porn starring Mohammed you'd like to post? :-)
Re:"offend some people." Ya think? (Score:5, Interesting)
I’m a Christian, and I wasn’t offended.
I think he’s incorrect, but I’m not offended by his theory.
Re:Thus the star over Bethlehem then (Score:4, Funny)
Or, perhaps God planned it on purpose exactly like that, so that the “magi from the East” would recognise Jesus’ birth and come to worship him, fulfilling prophecies such as Isaiah 60:3 [biblegateway.com].
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(Obviously, he would have used a sign that pagan astrologers would recognise as the birth of a king. Hence, the star.)
Re:Thus the star over Bethlehem then (Score:4, Insightful)
Why did God make the half-lives of U-238 and U-235 just so?
Re:Thus the star over Bethlehem then (Score:4, Funny)
Why did you feel it necessary to bring up a completely unrelated topic just to mock my belief in God?
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I thought you were joking about god deliberately putting the star there for the benefit of the pagan astrologers. Sorry.
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No, actually I was serious.
Isa. 60 is a passage which is a messianic prophecy. Like many messianic prophecies from the Old Testament, it does not clearly differentiate between the first coming of Jesus as a baby and his return in glory and his reign as predicted in Revelation, but it’s not too difficult to see where it switches over. Verses 1-3 refer to his birth:
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A "vaporware" tag? (Score:2)
jinkies! (Score:2)
Combine this with his deadly panthers, and I'm all scared, Scoob!
Corrigendum (Score:5, Funny)
Upon consultation with actual Koreans, it turns out that the original press release said that North Korea had "nuked a Frusion".
The BBC apologizes for this error.
North Korea is BEST KOREA! (Score:4, Funny)
How could we doubt someone with sunglasses that are so cool?
What *Are* They Doing in N Korea? (Score:3, Insightful)
A few years ago N Korea detonated a gigantic explosion that it claimed was nuclear (fission). Now it's claiming controlled fusion.
These claims are impossible to believe, since N Korea lies about so much. But it did demonstrate a gigantic explosion. What in fact is going on there in N Korea?
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Beloved Leader orders atoms to meld! (Score:4, Funny)
As all universe obeys Beloved Leader, atoms fused, creating clean, pure energy with no neutrons, no MSG, and no trans-fats.
Wonderful new creation for used in distillation of brandy.
-- babelfish from Nut Korean World News
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That sounds like a real crime against humanity.
Re:In other top stories... (Score:4, Funny)
eat repulsor-ray imperialist running-dog beeotches (Score:2)
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I don't seem to remember many examples when the lack of "clean cheap bountiful energy" stopped people from breeding...
Re:Now a credible threat to the west. (Score:4, Informative)
I think he missed a few words in there, but what he meant was:
Overpopulation is a pretext for racists [wikipedia.org] to advocate “population control” whereby they hope to address the poverty that breeds itself, particular in certain segments of the population who cannot seem to keep their legs closed. This is all supported with arguments such as follows:
Aww, hell. I’m forgetting where I am. I should’ve just said she was strongly against masturbation...
Now most of Slashdot will be up in arms, I’m sure.
Re:Now a credible threat to the west. (Score:5, Funny)
They'd have to figure out how to grow food first.
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Actually, in NK it's "Word To Your Motherland."
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Re:Nuclear Fusion the new softdrink (Score:4, Insightful)
Just out of curiosity, what part of "No peasants are starving, our economy is great, everyone else in the world envies/fears us, and by the way we just perfected nuclear fusion!" is a *mild* hallucination?
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It's fusion alright.
They've managed to fuse horseshit with bullshit, and now they're feeding it to the starving masses!
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Actually... [nhlbisupport.com]