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Raunchy Dance Routine a PR Nightmare For Microsoft 322

theodp writes "GeekWire reports on the techno-dance routine that preceded Microsoft's Windows Azure presentation at the Norwegian Developers Conference this week, which featured a group of women jumping around on stage to a song that included several drug references and the line: 'The words MICRO and SOFT don't apply to my penis.' In a strange effort to be inclusive, a monitor displaying the lyrics added, 'or vagina.' The official Windows Azure YouTube channel has posted an apology for 'a skit that involved inappropriate and offensive elements and vulgar language,' and said it's actively looking into the matter. Hey, could've been worse — at least @ASUS wasn't live-tweeting the event!"
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Raunchy Dance Routine a PR Nightmare For Microsoft

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  • Or Vagina? (Score:5, Funny)

    by eldavojohn ( 898314 ) * <(eldavojohn) (at) (> on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:38AM (#40282637) Journal

    'The words MICRO and SOFT don't apply to my penis.' In a strange effort to be inclusive, a monitor displaying the lyrics added, 'or vagina.'

    What in the hell is an "or vagina"? Is that new hardware slang for an OR gate?

  • by DickBreath ( 207180 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:41AM (#40282667) Homepage
    developers, Developers, DEVELOPERS, DEVELOPERS ?

    I Love This Company!
  • huh? (Score:4, Interesting)

    by MickyTheIdiot ( 1032226 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:46AM (#40282715) Homepage Journal

    Sorry.. was that a Loiter Squad skit?

    I can't see any way that as not meant as an intentional parody.

    Either way, or the writer was on drugs.

    Oh yeah, it's the latter. Never mind.

  • Childish (Score:5, Insightful)

    by aepervius ( 535155 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:46AM (#40282717)
    "'The words MICRO and SOFT don't apply to my penis.'"

    And the word "maturity" and "adulthood" don't seem to apply to your brain either.
  • by MRe_nl ( 306212 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:48AM (#40282741)

    But that dance routine WAS a disaster.
    Also, that's not Techno.

    • TFA was written by Todd Bishop, one of the founders of GeekWire. Apparently, he thought it was all perfectly scandalous. He must not get out much.

      If he has any connection to the Brownists, it would be at least ten generations back.

    • by jrumney ( 197329 )

      Also, that's not Techno.

      Cheese. The heavily processed type that comes in individually wrapped slices that are barely distinguishable from the plastic they are wrapped in. The choreography is of similar quality to the music. I can only guess that the product they're promoting is along the same lines. Nice example of how the bungled efforts of one small regional office can completely wreck your global product launch.

  • by Suzuran ( 163234 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:50AM (#40282767)

    I remember when they rolled out the Microsoft Mambo #5, it was so bad I had to leave the room so I wouldn't laugh in front of the customers. I don't know who thought this was a good idea, but they should be dragged to death behind a truck.

  • by OzPeter ( 195038 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:53AM (#40282799)

    I always thought that Microsoft made bad choices for music. For Windows 95 they used the Rolling Stones' Start Me Up, which contains the lyrics :

    If you start me up
    If you start me up I'll never stop

    Which was fine for an adv. campaign, but then the next line always seemed weird for Microsoft to want to associate with:

    You make a grown man cry

    Yet in hindsight was amazingly prophetic in the context of Win95 .

  • by mattr ( 78516 ) <.mattr. .at.> on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:54AM (#40282813) Homepage Journal

    It could be worse. I discovered a famous furniture company's name means "ass" in Swedish from some engineers who couldn't stop laughing whenever they would see these boxes everywhere. I couldn't find it in the dictionary so it must be colloquial.

    I wonder is there a way to search whether a made up brand name matches any word colloquial or not in any of the mainstream languages?

    • I head that the Chevy Nova sold poorly in the Latio markets. Nova means "No-Go" in Spanish.
      Funnier yet, in 1990, Perdue Chicken had a marketing problem in Japan. Their logo, "We sell fresh chicken" got translated by someone who had been away from the day to day culture of Japan. It came across as "It takes a strong man to make chickens fresh". Moreover, the choice of the words strong and fresh had a sexual connotation. Apparently, this commercial had the Japanse rolling around on the floor laughing i
      • The nova story makes no sense, as an almost native speaker of Spanish, I'd never read "Nova" as "no va", yet alone use "no va" instead on "no marcha" or "no anda" when referring to a car. But I can provide you with an alternative myth: The Mitsubishi Pajero is sold around here as "Montero" (maybe in the US, too?) because "pajero" is a pejorative term that could be translated as "wanker" in Spanish (or at least some dialects thereof).

    • You just go out and buy a Honda Fitta and drive through Scandinavia!

    • by phonewebcam ( 446772 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @11:11AM (#40283761) Homepage

      Quite - and Brits must never inform any Americans a colleague has just nipped out for a quick fag down the back alley, no matter how accurate and innocent it sounds to them.

  • extends all the way down to their presentations. What 20-something newly minted "manager" was responsible for that, I wonder?

  • by l0ungeb0y ( 442022 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @09:57AM (#40282843) Homepage Journal

    The harder Microsoft tries to look cool, the more they look like awkward social retards staring at their feet in the corner of the highschool dance. I'm hard pressed to think of a company with a worse public image -- aside from Haliburton and PG&E, who actually kill people to achieve profit.

    • by DoofusOfDeath ( 636671 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:31AM (#40283259)

      I disagree with you regarding the particular kind of misfit they come across as.

      In my mind, Microsoft is a stodgy, big company representing most of the evils of old men corrupted by wealth. They use patents and lobbyists to lock out competitors, they screw of customers and business partners, they belong to the BSA, etc.

      So to me, it would like Mr. Burns [] from the Simpsons paid for the high-school prom, and then demanded all students stand around him to watch him do a Dirty Dancing version of the Charleston [].

  • not very good though.

    sounds like scooter, but 100x worse. why couldn't they just steal some nice chiptune.

  • Dandy music, I glad the audience was paid to be there.
  • by Bender Unit 22 ( 216955 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:01AM (#40282903) Journal


    Lame lyrics and where's the raunchy dance?
    Geekwire needs to check up on the state of music videos these days(the uncensored versions). Or maybe not, it will give them a heartattack. :D

  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:02AM (#40282913)

    And I get this? Come on, that looked like routine from my junior high talent show, but not as raunchy. This is more blatant headline sensationlism by Slashdot!

    But I do so love the ESL lyrics.

    Blue Jeans on Fire!
    Chevrolet, Elvis!
    Blue jeans on fire!
    New York, let's go!

  • by crazyjj ( 2598719 ) * on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:03AM (#40282929)

    Every incident like this I've ever been involved with usually began with a staff meeting where everyone thought it would be a great idea to be young and hip by putting the young and hip guy in charge of some presentation. And it usually ended with said young and hip guy explaining why he honestly thought that having someone sing a rendition of "Cop Killer" to a backdrop of nude dancers would be appropriate for a presentation of of the company's annual shareholders' report.

    Leave the musical numbers for the Oscars and the comedy skits for SNL. They already do them bad enough without you trying too.

    • I think this could be replaced with just "Don't put the young/new person in charge of spicing things up". Hipster is a bit of a charged word, and I think there are plenty that others wouldn't think of as hipsters who would still make this sort of mistake (e.g. recently-graduated frat-bros who used to set up skits that pushed the edge of racism).

  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:05AM (#40282959)

    Didn't think it was all that bad. Sure it hurt my ears, but didn't touch my delicate sensibilities.

  • Macrohard would be a good name for a fishing goods company

    An observation I thought would never find relevance, except now

  • That sounds like they got caught by a trap laid out by the YesMen. They probably set up an event organizing company as a storefront and waited till someone hired them to pull of that stunt.

    Either that, or Monty Python.

  • Tired of this (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Dripdry ( 1062282 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:26AM (#40283185) Journal

    You know what's immature? The fact that we as a culture seem ok with glorifying violence against people, killing and maiming them, but when you use the word "penis" then OMG! horrible! It's not natural Bullshit.

    The world would be a happier, healthier place if we just stood up against this nonsense and admit that sex is fine, fun, and healthy. Seriously, who made that headline? Other than a stupid song with some dumb lyrics, who cares? Sure, it doesn't really get across what MS wants, but a "PR Nightmare"? Give me a break.

    It's headlines like these that keep perpetuating the controlling and immature notion that sexuality is a sin, punishable by censure or banishment from society. If MS had used a video of the paperclip smacking around then crushing an apple that oozes blood it wouldn't be appropriate but would it be a "PR Nightmare"?

    • Re:Tired of this (Score:4, Insightful)

      by JustNiz ( 692889 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @11:13AM (#40283799)

      Sex IS fine, fun and healthy but I don't want to hear about sex organs in a damn song and/or at a business conference.
      Mostly because its a poor low-brow excuse for real entertainment because its based only on cheap shock value, which doesn't actually work because I'm not even slightly shocked anyway.

    • by Hatta ( 162192 )

      It's not the vulgarity that's offensive. It's the complete lack of any sense of humor. Genuine funniness absolves all.

  • Awkward... (Score:5, Informative)

    by khendron ( 225184 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:33AM (#40283273) Homepage

    I haven't seen something like that since the time my company accidentally hired strippers for our Vegas-themed Christmas party.

    • I haven't seen something like that since the time my company accidentally hired strippers for our Vegas-themed Christmas party.

      That's tame compared to the party [] that Munich Re threw for it's top "performers" back in 2007. They had pre-paid prostitutes who kept track of the number of "uses" with stamps with everything happening in a large communal steam bath. What happens in Vegas may stay in Vegas, but even Vegas couldn't throw a party like that. If Vegas want's to compete with other gambling destinations, they will need to dial up the debauchery or risk losing their "sin city" reputation to other more worthy contenders.

  • by TheSkepticalOptimist ( 898384 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:34AM (#40283291)

    Only PR.

    You are talking about Microsoft, mission complete.

  • Terrible! (Score:4, Insightful)

    by flibbidyfloo ( 451053 ) on Monday June 11, 2012 @10:50AM (#40283501)

    I'm only offended by how bad the song was. If you watch the video you can hear the crowd's indifference to the whole thing, except for one person sort of laughing at the "joke". The whole thing was pretty lame and ham-handed, which just made the use of vulgarity more notable, like when your dad tells a "dirty" joke to your friends and it's just a bad joke. It makes it way more uncomfortable.

"I shall expect a chemical cure for psychopathic behavior by 10 A.M. tomorrow, or I'll have your guts for spaghetti." -- a comic panel by Cotham