English City Council "Not Ready" for Zombie Attack 121
Unlike the CDC, a freedom of information request submitted to the Leicester City Council has revealed that the council is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion. From the article: "'We've had a few wacky ones before but this one did make us laugh,' said Lynn Wyeth, head of information governance. The Freedom of Information Act allows a right of access to recorded information held by public authorities. Ms Wyeth said she was unaware of any specific reference to a zombie attack in the council's emergency plan, however some elements of it could be applied if the situation arose."
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Uh. Love you too?
Francis, Buddy! (Score:1)
You are prepared! When I first-post they're all over me, tearing at my brain lining and giving such perfect proof of my infantophagia that I mod them up before I've even realised it's me they're talking about!
You're Laughing Now (Score:5, Funny)
Will you be laughing when the apocalypse comes, and you look back and say, "We weren't prepared, oh god, we weren't prepared...."
No! You'll be wandering the streets of Leicester, all dripping blood and rotting flesh, hungering for brains. BE PREPARED!
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That's okay. They don't have any brains for the zombies to munch on anyways.
Re:You're Laughing Now (Score:5, Funny)
no we do what we have allways done - promote them to the House of Lords.
Re:You're Laughing Now (Score:4, Interesting)
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Fine. I prepared some brains to see how they taste.
They really need ketchup. Lots of it.
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Nonsense. Black pepper.
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No, I've only ever had brains from English supermarkets.
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Sorry, can't be prepared. NOBODY (*) expects the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!
(*) Ziiiing!
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Duh. (Score:4, Insightful)
If you're prepared for it, it's not unexpected.
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You Know... (Score:5, Funny)
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relatively sensitive to rough treatment and inadequate servicing, the direct impingement gas system tends to foul faster and under sustained firing can build up enough heat to melt lacquer coatings from coated ammo, leading to jams that are very fun to clear with the parts so hot.
if you want to use a semi-auto or assault rifle for zombie protection there are two families of rifle to look at, AK47 and SKS, both are tolerant of rough treatment. my personal pr
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What about something in an easy to handle shotgun? For the person who doesn't shoot much but still wants to be ready for the zombies. Also squirrels. Automatic is a plus for the squirrels.
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My biggest problem with the AR isn't the fouling, its the locking lugs on the bolt- they bite into misfed cartridges and fubar the weapon. I have jammed ARs simply by hitting the bolt release too ha
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Fouling was a big deal back in the 60s. But now I confirm that its not an issue unless, as the coward said, you burn a ridiculous amount of ammo.
Good advise on the lacquer.
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it is restricted by law pretty much nowhere
Are we still talking about Leicester? Because I seem to recall that blanks for starting pistols are restricted by law in England.
you need a shotgun licence, not so easy to get (Score:5, Funny)
In the UK you'll need a shotgun licence to own a shotgun. Not so easy to get. You'll have to persuade the police (they do a home visit for each application) that you have a good reason for needing one, and "being prepared for the zombie invasion" probably won't be the winning answer....
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exactly! (Score:2)
indeed. claiming fighting zombie invasions as your reason for wanting one might get you into the "batshit insane" category pretty quickly though....
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Not that i agree with your assessment of the AR15, i've only used the M16A2/4 and M4. But I would say you should only choose a gun that the local army and police stockpile ammo for. You would have to stockpile a vast amount of ammo to make sitting in one place worth it. All that shooting will do nothing but attract more zombie targets and expend more ammo. Being mobile (light!) seems more preferable, imo.
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just not for a SHTF and especially a zombie SHTF there is plenty of 7.62x39 around and more of it is in robust packaging, like russian "spam" cans twin packed in wooden crates, instead of cardboard boxes in cardboard cases and maybe wrapped in plastic
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Weaponry (Score:2)
Here are my thoughts on weaponry:
Guns are ok but you need the right one. Shotguns have high recoil and the ammo is bulky and slow on reloads. Semi-autos can also have a reload problem since you can burn through ammo fast, and you also have to deal with muzzle rise as well. Large caliber pistols take a bit of practice to get good at, the large ones such as the .357 mag. or .45 have a bit of recoil to deal with. Pistols are really only good in the 7 m range. It takes a lot practice to get accurate at longer r
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Six of one... You get a lot more stopping power out of a 50cal than a .223 Remington, but the (except in California; stupid "bullet button" requirement) detachable magazine and (semi)automatic operation of the AR15 would certainly have advantages. Still, with proper training, from 250' away, even firing at a moving target, a shooter can get off 3 shots with a bolt-action rifle in only six seconds, and score two hits -- including a head shot.
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Oswald used a 6.5 mm Italian rifle. see: http://www.google.com/search?q=wrist+rockets&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a#q=wrist+rockets&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=6ik&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=ivns&source=univ&tbm=shop&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=FHvzTartCsnegQfx4unCCw&ved=0CDoQrQQ&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=607e1640359d683b&biw=1202&bih=559 [google.com]
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Hey now, don't be so quick to dismiss the too heavy-caliber to be practical zombie-slaying options. You could install some of those red velvet-rope waiting lines, and also put up a big sign reading "FREE BRAIIIINS" on a kiosk... Surely the zombies would patiently queue up (I mean, it's not like they have anywhere else to go), and when you've got a few dozen deep...kablammo!
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That's because most European men are more secure in their masculinity than many Americans. FYI:
http://www.google.com/products/catalog?q=AR50&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=shop&cid=892394520470487019&sa=X&ei=En3zTazXB8TTgAei09HLCw&ved=0CCEQ8wIwAA [google.com]
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Personally, I'd prefer a Mossberg short barrel shotgun with a magazine extension. Just saying.
Unexpected? (Score:3)
is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion.
As opposed to all of those expected zombie attacks?
Re:Unexpected? (Score:4, Funny)
No one expects the zombie inquisition!
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is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion.
As opposed to all of those expected zombie attacks?
You telling me you arent expecting a zombie attack at some point?
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Don't you think for one second that they don't want to eat our tasty brains.
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Coward.
Be a man. Off them and do the world a service.
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Just emo vampires, as opposed to other kinds? You, my friend, are a trad goth with a chip on your shoulder, aren't you? The swooning tween girls remark gives it away: jealousy, the oldest emotion.
Shawn of the dead (Score:2)
It's happening! Get your cricket things and go smack some zombies!
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Shawn of the dead? Nut up or shut up! - Zombieland
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Haven't had time to check that one out. Do you recommend it?
Simple and obvious solution... (Score:5, Insightful)
...for any zombie invasion of the English countryside: Barricade yourself in the Winchester.
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Just nitpicking - the movie was set (and shot) in London. Getting to the Winchester may not be the smartest move if you're in the countryside :)
Of course I suppose it is up to debate whether it's smarter to be in a big city or in the country side during a zombie invasion - I'd go with remote countryside locations in the hope that Zombies just pass you by en route to the next major food source/city.
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Uhh... (Score:2)
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Did a zombie eat the part of your brain that does hyperlinks, or has it always been missing?
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This was a bug even before the great redesign.
Copy/paste impaired, am I? At least I know how to use the preview. Now get off my lawn!
Won't the invasion be in America (Score:1)
I reckon they've done their research and after watching a whole heap of zombie movies, realised that if there is an outbreak it will most likely start in America. This will give them plenty of time to formulate a plan before it spreads to England.
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Well, it's a reasonable assumption. A lot of Bad Things start in the American Colonies, then move to the UK after they've proven themselves here. Marijuana prohibition... infinite extension of copyright terms... reality TV...
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What do you mean "start"?
Did I miss something? I didn't notice FOX and the Neocons* ever stopping... ^^
* OK, let's not insult conservatives. Neocons don't conserve anything. They destroy. Things like the constitution. A better name would be "fascists". (Also: Not saying they are limited to the Republican party, or the USA.)
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Everyone knows the zombie apocalypse is already hapenning: it started in Germany, and authorities are lying that it's E coli infection.
Too late (Score:3, Funny)
I have been on the tube... the zombies are already there
Stupid Question (Score:1)
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Re:Stupid Question (Score:4, Informative)
About FOIA... I thought it was American legislation, but this is definitely a UK city. Is it called the same thing across the pond?
It is not a stupid question. In fact it is the most serious post here that I have read. The UK has the Freedom of Information Act 2000 [legislation.gov.uk]. In my own country of Australia we have the Freedom of Information act 1982 [austlii.edu.au]. There are plenty of other countries [wikipedia.org] that have something similar.
And this has been an entirely frivolous and annoying use the act.
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The information officer at the council obviously disagrees, he could have denied the request if he had though it was 'lacking any serious purpose or value'. If nothing else it has brought knowledge of citizen's rights under the act to a wider audience
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And here in South Africa, the ANC government is desperately trying to force the Protection of Information Bill into law, essentially criminalizing whistle-blowing rather than protecting it. So much for SA being a democracy, or a progressive African country. It's just another dictatorship with the figurehead rotating every few years.
Triffids (Score:2)
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They've had 50 years to prepare for a triffid attack, but I bet they're not ready for that, either.
Darn it...I was blissfully unaware of triffids until I read your post and went a-googling. Now I'll not sleep a wink tonight. Thanks a lot!
More pop culture humor. (Score:1, Troll)
Blah blah blah Chuck Norris! Ha ha ha.
Blah blah blah bacon! Ha ha ha.
Blah blah blah I can has? Ha ha ha.
Blah blah blah Weiner! Ha ha ha.
Blah blah blah Zombies. Ha ha ha.
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Do you know Kevin Bacon?
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I think I am only two hops from him.
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After getting blown off for all the help in WW II don't expect much from the US when the zombies come a callin'.
Where the hell did that come from? Who blew off whom?
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"You'd all be speaking German and eating brains if it wasn't for the US" ?
What about an *expected* zombie invasion? (Score:2)
... has revealed that the council is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion.
Does that mean the council is prepared for zombie invasions in general, but just doesn't know how to deal with unexpected ones?
The Leicester City Council wouldn't know, but... (Score:3)
The British have a perfectly cromulent plan to deal with zombie invasion, involving possibly activating the 'white elephants' of squadron 666, and definitely loading the SCORPION STARE software in all enabled CCTV surveillance systems in zombie plagued areas. Playing an electric violin arrangement of Wagner's 'Ride of the Valkyries' at them may also be needed in a few cases, but really we're saving that for the plague's masters.
Oh, you're not cleared CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN? Nevermind - I seem to have misspoken. The British have absolutely no plans to deal with zombie invasions.
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I don't think the white elephants would be ideal for dealing with a zombie invasion SCORPION STARE sure, but not the white elephants.
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How many times do I have to say it- Dammit, watch your OPSEC!
You are in violation of Section Three of the Official Secrets Act. Slashdot does not have GAME ANDES REDSHIFT clearance. You'll be answering to the auditors for this one...
Silly? (Score:1)
Oh, hilarious (Score:3)
FOIA exists for a reason and that reason is not to make flippant and pointless enquiries.
There are already plenty of threats [economist.com] to rescind or curtail FOIA inthe UK and nonsense like this, which wastes time and money, will only lend credence to those calls.
In other words: wise up.
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At the moment this is the MoTD in the /. footer :
"Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans; it's lovely to be silly at the right moment. -- Horace"
Cheers
Jon
On the other hand.. (Score:2)
.. you ought to admire the typically British sense of humour shining through here. I mean, poking a bit of fun at officials is not actually a bad thing in a world that is becoming increasingly obsessed with boring rules and regulations.
Yes, I know this takes "valuable" time, but let's face it - to BUY entertainment and job enjoyment like that would cost more - after such a stunt the rest of the day goes so much easier.
It's not always about money..
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If freedom of information means anything, it means that the zombie invaders must be answered along with everyone else. Set your information systems up properly, and it should be perfectly easy to manage
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Leicester, use Olympic plan for US Tea Baggers. (Score:2)
Leicester can just use the plans they came up for the coming Olympics for dealing with visiting American Tea Party dignitaries.
Not enough difference between zombies to tea baggers to bother with the extra expense. Close enough for government work, anyway.
Good grief! (Score:1)
What do they mean, unlikely? (Score:2)
Just issue SIGSTOP to the parent processes that don't ignore SIGCHLD, and once child processes exit, you have zombies!
Marketing Gold! (Score:2)
Anybody want to meet me at Zombie-paloozo 2012 in Leicester next year?
If their smart the town council will organize that, they just had a gift dropped on their lap. :)
no laughing matter... (Score:2)
I think you can replace zombie invasion with virus contamination, or swarm infestation, etc....
the idea is that something is able to spread at an abnormal rate, will you be able to contain it.....someone coughs and spreads a virus, the next one gets it, and so on, whether a zombie bites you, and then you bite someone else, or someone coughs on you, it is the same, disease containment is the point of the story, and the fact they actually could not see the real issue, is pretty sad. Zombie movies just add a l